Fractured is attractive. Polished is dull

I admire Eminem’s honesty. For one, he’s intense in his writing. And he confronts what hurts and often, what other people shy away from dealing with.

I am of the opinion that honesty and total openness, vulnerability, the imperfections and all, is the true display of trust. When someone bares all of themselves for you and let you into their soul, heart and mind. No amount of words can rival that act. Experiencing that proximity with people is priceless.

But, largely, we seem to easily default to having high walls around our emotions. You know, we are so guarded that we never live at all. We are too careful. We even hold back from expressing our truest feelings, we tip toe around them as if our lives are a movie whose scenes can be cut, rubbished and filmed all over again.

“You can’t be afraid to deal with your demons. You’ve got to go there to be able to write.” It made sense reading Lucinda Williams’ words, especially at a time when I began writing everyday. Which can be overwhelming and depleting in one’s content arsenal.

Writing of which, a perfect example of this is Khaya Dlanga. When he moved from the Eastern Cape to Cape Town to study Advertising, his mother had scraped together everything she had. He struggled in the cape! At times, having to sleep on lecture rooms and later, in an abandoned building near campus. Had to go without food for long periods at times. Khaya is candid about all these stories through a blog he wrote a few yeas back.

He’s not perfect. He’s honest. And his blog became huge because, I assume, it resonated with people in its candour. The stories expressed are what many of us are experiencing or have gone through before. Khaya’s fractures made me a devoted reader of his blog. In some way, it validated my own journey in that I saw someone who has succeeded by overcoming a heap of challenges.

When we act like mannequins, we miss the ripe opportunity to expose rich layers of our story. The nuances that make it unique and pulsating. Here’s the thing we seem to often forget: people are interested in other people. That’s how we function. And we are often drawn toward and are deeply affected by the realest expressions of the human journey.

Fractures and contours in people are breathtaking. Too polished a human being is a bore. Methinks.